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Book Jacket

Rank 7593 (-103)

Word Count

789

Date submitted

01.10.2010

Date Updated

01.13.2010

How I feel about you

by G.J. Velez

Essay

The title is enough

L-O-V- EFFING E
Just another number to the stadistic. Its everything youve heard before put together in a different manner. I am no exeption to loves inigmatic touch, though I belive to be so. This was mostly written for me.

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ElevenSaysEverything

wrote 34 days ago

I absolutely love th line "But I wish to hold you..."
The entire essay was amazingly beutiful!!! Although there are quite a few spelling mistakes, most are really easy to find and didn't bother me at all (not even worth pointing out). While I was reading this I got the vibe that it was written quickly because the feelings gush out in a giant volcano of contradicting emotions. I want to come back and read this in a year or two and be able to say that I've felt the feelings that you encompass here because they are beautiful and sincere.
:)

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Evie J

wrote 171 days ago

"So I fear...
I fear loosing you
I fear having you
I fear hurting you
But I wish to hold you..." ----- Gosh, that was just brilliant! I loved this as well! You should totally do more poems!

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Jewel Song

wrote 195 days ago

I can really relate to this, and I agree with rainshadow, your writing does have a historic feel to it. It flows nicely and it's easy to read.

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rainshadow

wrote 199 days ago

Is it me, or did this remind me of Jane Eyre? Yes, it's me. I bet people are looking at me going, are you stupid or what?
I really like this, it's informal and formal at the same time. I like how the narrator is talking to themselves, it is a very imaginative idea. A few things you could improve on though, like capital letters. You know how I am with capitals (well, you dont, but just ask my friends and they will tell you I'm a complete NIGHTMARE) I said this to Hexen with Love you to Death, I dont like the many elipses (...) they drive me insane as well. I'm picky with them. Over use of them can ruin the whole effect, and it just crashes the story. A typo at the top (youa re) (that was the typo by the way, I'm guessing it was you are). You should try historical fiction, your writing has some sort of history tense to it. It sounds proper and fully english... (or american, but I'm english so I would call it english) and this is an extremely well written piece of text. Well done :D Take up my advice, Historical fiction. Your writing has that feel to it, you know what I mean?
Anyways,
rainshadow

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