Where am I, I can't seem to find my way
Lost in my darkness again, same debts to pay...
The mask held up so well, happiness is fun faking,
But only for so long, the mask is breaking.
In my mind I hear the screams and feel the bars
I’m locked away inside myself afraid to show these scars.
I don't know who I am; I no longer know why I'm here.
I see so much pain and have nothing left to hold dear.
My wings wilt before me while my foundation is crumbling.
Only chaotic emotion and thought now, I can't hold onto anything.
There is no direction here only infinite clouded paths
And with no more lights to guide me, I don't think I'll last.
Seething with so much hatred, but bursting with love,
Content to fall behind, yet striving to rise above.
I speak of hope, yet I haven't dreamed in so long.
Tell others it will get better, but wonder if I'm wrong.
I know such compassion and feel so much empathy.
Yet I turn my back, barely showing even sympathy.
I make others feel revived while I die inside,
I move and I breathe, but am I still alive?
I repair other's lives, while I lay bent and broken
They all leave me behind not a thank you spoken.
Where is my life line, where is my savior?
Where is the moment in the sun I can savor?
No.
I help those in need, even if I need saving,
I feed those who hunger, even if it's what I'm craving.
I brighten other's spirits, while mine grows dim,
I lead others to self victory, because I can't win.
I help other's good causes, because I am a lost cause.
I help them escape their demons , while I'm maimed by their claws.
And as you discard me don't feel sorrow, I am no fool.
I am here at the cost of my self, an almost human tool.
Do not think of me as selfless, because I have no real self.
So leave me for another to use, I wait on this metaphoric shelf.
But why am I not complete inside?
Still no question answered while another piece of me dies.
I don't want to be a tool, I want to be me.
But since I don't know who that is, I guess I'll never be free.
